What is Love?

The word “love” is frequently heard in films, among celebrities, and in everyday life. In almost every relationship, we use the word “love.” But what is love? It’s rarely understood. Often, what is called love is actually lust.

Love means pure selflessness for the pleasure of the beloved without any personal motive, whereas lust involves selfishness, staying in the relationship only as long as it gratifies our senses. When there’s pain, discomfort, or trouble requiring tolerance and sacrifice, relationships often fall apart.

Therefore, love is also the most misused word. Most people in this world have not experienced pure love, as its basis is a service attitude without any personal motive. This attitude comes from the pure self. To know the pure self, we need to practice Bhakti Yoga as mentioned in the Srimad Bhagavad Gita.

Here is a wonderful definition of pure love:

sarvathä dhvaàsa-rahitaà saty api dhvaàsa-käraëe yad bhäva-bandhanaà yünoù sa premä parikértitaù

Translation: “When the affectionate bond between a young man and a young woman can never be destroyed, even when there is every cause for the destruction of that relationship, the attachment between them is said to be pure love.”

This describes the eternal loving affairs between Lord Krishna and His pure conjugal associates. Such attachment is unbreakable and unshakable between the lover and the beloved in any situation or circumstance. Often, we do not see such relationships in this world. Sometimes, it might feel like such love is impossible, but it does exist.

For instance, when a mother loves her child despite the child being a great offender, she continues to bless the child. Similarly, a wife might continue serving her husband despite his offenses, and such women are celebrated as Sati in the Puranas. But the perfection of all relationships is achieved when all beings of this creation, who are naturally part and parcel of the Supreme Lord Krishna, love and serve Him.

Establishing a relationship with Him without any personal motive can provide the highest amount of joy, never experienced in any worldly relationship. Such love is the purest and highest form of relationship.

Lord Sri Krishna explains this joy in the Bhagavad Gita (9.2):

räja-vidyä räja-guhyaà pavitram idam uttamam pratyakñävagamaà dharmyaà su-sukhaà kartum avyayam

Translation: “This knowledge is the king of education, the most secret of all secrets. It is the purest knowledge, and because it gives direct perception of the self by realization, it is the perfection of religion. It is everlasting, and it is joyfully performed.”